My Favorite Woman, Ms. Carrie L. Jacobs

“Dedicated”

sung by R. Kelly & Public Announcement

Never thought that love could be so kind

Till you came and brought me peace of mind

I'll treasure every moment spent with you

'Cause no one does the things for me you do, so I'm

Dedicating this one (Oh) to my favorite girl (She's the only one)

She's the only woman in the whole wide world (In the whole wide world)

Dedicating this one (Oh, yeah) to my favorite girl

(She's the only woman in the world, world, woo)

In 1999, I was new to the Atlanta area. Being 20 and a mother of one, I was ready to make the necessary moves to provide for myself and my son. I moved here with my son‘s father. He secured a place for us to live, and I moved here when an apartment was available. He and I worked our butts off, ensuring that we began the adventure of providing a home for our son. In the midst of this, we had to find a babysitter.

The one that we were using quit on us the morning that I had to drop him off. This lady came from nowhere and said she would watch my son. Told me her credentials as being a daycare worker and how she loves children so much. Once I heard her story, I felt secure in letting her watch my son.

It was just a gut feeling that everything would be all right with her. In a short period, she became more than my sitter. She became a mother to me. Ms. Carrie Wynn-Jacobs, my Georgia mother, was the light of my life. Born in Southwest Georgia, Ms. Carrie came into this world ready to fill it up with an abundance of love. Her beautiful spirit and personality left a mark on others. No matter what life threw at her, she stayed strong and faced it head-on.

From 1999 to 2004, she watched over my children and treated them like her own. Even after she stopped being my sitter, she would still call me to bring her “her babies.” The dynamic we shared was unlike the one I had with my biological mother. Ms. Carrie showed me how to step into my womanhood. Being a young single mother was an arduous journey at first, but she helped me to maneuver through it with ease. She always knew what to do and what to say.

I remember the stories she shared about her upbringing in a large family, helping raise her nieces and nephews, her reason for not having children, her time as a manager for Domino’s Pizza, and her 20 plus years as a childcare worker. She had no problem with sharing her life with others. I learned this from her: be an open book when asked and not before. She had no problem with sharing her story, but she only shared when asked. Sometimes misunderstood, Ms. Carrie meant what she said and said what she meant. I loved her for that.

She made me feel like she was indeed my mother. Whenever we were out or around her family members, she would refer to me as her daughter. She would always tell me to thank my mom for having me so that God could send me to her. She would call me every night, and we talked for hours about any and everything. She would play her blues, with her cigarettes and ashtray at hand, and would pour herself some Christian Brothers brandy in her mini glass.

There was no limit to what she talked about with me, and I felt the same with her. I shared with her my dreams, my fears, my ambitions, and everything in between. I feel free when I talk to her. Unfortunately, something went awry, and we lost contact with one another. No misunderstanding. None of the usual reasons people have for losing communication with someone. Just an uncontrollable side effect of life.

Over the years, I still thought of her, wondering what she was doing on her birthday. Or if she had her niece cut and color her hair a beautiful color. Then my mind would drift off, wondering if she missed me the way I missed her. After all of that thinking, I would say out loud, “I love you, Ms. Carrie. I’ll see you soon.” Every time I thought of her, I said and affirmed that. I never thought that I would see her again after her passing. The only regret I have is not being able to hire a private investigator to find her. She meant that much to me.

Instead of stating the mixture of emotions I feel, I will just share one. I miss her so much. As I sit here, typing through my tears, I find comfort in knowing that she is no longer in pain. I pray that her family and friends can take comfort in that as well. Ms. Carrie was a wonderful woman with a beautiful soul. God may have said that it’s her time to come home, but she will continue to live on through those of us who loved her.